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| .disconsertingly.enthusiastic. |
| 02.16.04 (3:23 pm) [edit] |
|
[ music | yo-yo ma.crouching.tiger.hidden.dragon score ] haven't been freakishly inspired lately.. discovering depression is the only true motivator I've had all my life.. when I'm busy and content, I create or produce less.. when I'm angry with the world, I choose not to bother with it.. but when I'm depressed I find it easier to extract pieces of myself and put them down in writing or by drawing.. I appearently only draw now when I'm really low.. I don't do it for fun.. don't think I ever did... [wow, how cool and dispondent do I sound?] as Henry Rollins pointed out... [i]"but that fat fuck, Jim Morrison, once said.. Hold on to your depression, because its some of the most righteous and intense moments you'll ever have.."[/i] guess just thats how humanity works.. I mean if you consider Tennyson, Poe, Thomas, et others... all rather morbid writers, but all possesed with Romantic ideals.. angry and powerful.. seethingly dark & sexy.. hmmm well thats a goal to keep in mind at least.. On another semi.related topic... I've been annoyingly sensitive to other people lately.. I can't get the gift of sight, No; I get wonderful empathy... the universe is trying to impart some glorious lesson on to me, but I'd rather it just spell it out, instead of making me uncomfortable around groups of people.. whomsoever is proud of being empahic has never tuned in to the world radio... this is a unhappy place with wants, needs, and desires... all unkept and loitering... its making me rather edgy and hungry.. like the lusty hunger for sex or tearing the flesh off of killed prey.. a bit too primal to be safe around other people I think.. hmmmm back to brooding.. try to finish watching Legend with Minou... +laine+ |
posted by: Soliel (reply)
post date: 02.16.04 (3:32 pm)
I know exactly how you feel , it blows I'm so far down that I can't forsee there being light anytime soon .
posted by: lyinghere (reply)
post date: 02.16.04 (10:25 pm)
its there... I'm just in no rush to find it this week...
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-silence- .speak without fear. .know that beauty is balance/beauty is flesh. .know that life is a road we fall blindly downward. .know that when we touch, we affect things. .know this all means something. .love is only here to devour & fondle us. |