Blog For Free!
Archives
Home
2008 June
2008 May
2008 April
2008 March
2008 February
2008 January
2007 December
2007 November
2007 October
2007 September
2007 August
2007 July
2007 June
2007 May
2007 April
2007 March
2007 February
2007 January
2006 December
2006 November
2006 October
2006 September
2006 August
2006 July
2006 June
2006 May
2006 April
2006 March
2006 February
2006 January
2005 December
2005 November
2005 October
2005 September
2005 August
2005 July
2005 June
2005 May
2005 April
2005 March
2005 February
2005 January
2004 December
2004 November
2004 October
2004 September
2004 August
2004 July
2004 June
2004 May
2004 April
2004 March
2004 February
2004 January
2003 December
My Links
=== LYINGHERE ===
Minou's Blog
Rinna
tBlog
My Profile
Send tMail
My tFriends
My Images
Sponsored
Blog
|
======================== |
| .adventures.in.chaos. |
| 01.30.04 (11:17 pm) [edit] |
|
[ mood | reminescing ] [ music | the noose .a.perfect.circle. ] [i]I'm more than just a little curious about how you're planning to go about making your amends.. to the dead.[/i] .with.your.halo.slipping.down. [LINE] As I promised I would talk more about me, myself, and the people I've known.. Here is a personal tale of dread and woe... [i]once upon a time I grew up... ... these are some Hick Adventures ...[/i] I'm from a small town near toronto... if anyone is familiar with southern ontario, you know its basically a conduit of smaller cities that make up the GTA [grand theft auto, or rather the Greater Toronto Area as they call it now]... anyways, although I am more or less from a small hick town [pop 36000+ at the time] we were always within 10-40 mins of a city... so instead of 'cow-tipping' [as I am asked frequently what its like to do, and 'No' I dont know..] we would go to one of like eighteen theathers in the area or hit one of like 8 major malls... mind you this is like senior highschool by this point, so cutting class to go see a movie wasn't uncommon... hmm whats the point here... kay, highschool consisted of friends that had interesting side adventures.. it was like a bad road trip with hicks... but memories of my one friend Kelly that owned a trampoline; he trained for the pentatholon [run;bike;swim;archery;eq uestrian] and this was one of his work out tools... to this day I still never understood what the point was in having to be half naked to dismantle that trampoline... he just needed to not have a shirt on for this... There was another time, when we absolutely had to go see Twister, so right after class we blastoff for the nearest theater... we turned a 20min drive into an 8 min race.. we missed the previews, but fuck we got to make cracks about Antie Emm avoiding the suck zone!!! we nearly died speeding into the back of a volkswagon beatle.. made the day more adventurous... hmmmm other stories... well there was the time my friends Rob and Kristan were on a daredevil tear... after pointless discusions [I was told] about the weight of a Ton Pickup and the physics that say its difficult to have something of great mass escape the bounds of gravity.. In hickdom, well... Kristan bets Rob he can't jump his Pickup over some ditch in his back Orchard.. All Four Wheels, ya see... Again I missed being there... they're both in the cab, they gun the engine, and hit the bank... VOOOOOOSSSSHH :shock: Rob does it!!! The fucking Pickup actually gets air!! It crashes down and actually doesn't roll either... I know, I know.. thats not funny... but wait ... there's more... So Kristan's out like ten bucks or something retarded, like use of his left testicle for a week.. but anyways, Rob's all shit-happy cuz He shows up our 'genius' friend... he gets his Pickup home and a large CLUNK interupts his mood :? Rob opens up his hood and looks around.. "SHIT" The fucking Battery fell into the engine destroying the casing and that sounded the death of his Pickup... well that and after checking it out, the realization that the heavy steel frame of this ninety eighties monster of a truck had split the frame in three places... *sigh* that truck was missed... it drove us to many a movie or drinking event in *snicker* the bush [okay, 'the bush' in s.ontario is someones back yard, but there is a convienece store like ten minutes away]... This was the same truck we bailed hay into, or dragged lawn mowers around in.. the same truck that had gastank2 strapped on with a coat hanger... the reason we drove it fast was to be clear if the tank fell free from the frame... also the same truck Rob was too lazy to drive into town, so I drove it for him sans liscense while he slept the whole ten mintues it took us to get there... I could never park that thing well... Well to add another story about Rob and vehicles.. Rob's truck being rust fodder for the scrappers, he bought a tiny gold 88 Honda: sunroof, low riding, two seater that squeezed could fit six people illegally.. Well other Hick thing we did involved the driving.. driving was all we really had to do as teenagers.. so there are lots of backroads and hills you can thunder down at law defying speeds... anyways, Rob decides his Honda is the fastest shit since this week [or his last truck escapade]... Understand, Rob was a fuck up, but thats what friends are for; if you can't make your own fun, let someone else fuck around and do it for you... reasons they are friends and you love them, sorta.. Anyways, back to the Gold Honda.. after tearing around familar backroads of drit & there, is this Escrapemenet near Milton, its our ski hill, rock climbing, and camp site thats like five mins away.. its a baby mountain, if mountains were green bumps on the earths surface.. any ways, Rob wants to see how fast this new car can go.. how do you get Xtra speed??? You go down a big hill of course... So we take a trail up and find a road to bullet down.. there's a slight jump which gives you some air.. so there's Me, Rob driving, his sister, and her friend with us... we do the drive and get some nice speed... its a great rush!!! oh to be young and stupid again.. anyways, we do this like twice and then one more time we figure we can really max out the car... so from the Top we gun it.. we're doing like 120k mid way and a giant propane tanker truck starts backing in to a farm lot.... :shock: we are _soooooooo_ fucked... Rob hits the breaks but that turns out to be rather pointless on gravel covered pavement... the truck starts pulling forward into the farms drive way and we miss the fucking thing by about ten feet... so that damnear earned us a darwin award, [yes I said damnear; its one word dontcha know] but admitedly we would have died in a huge explosion!! It was on my list of stupid ways to die but make a statment on the way out.... of course other things like dry-humping a zepplin till it ignites is up there too... well I have many more pointless stories to pass on... I hope this one at least made someones day =p cheers +laine+ |
| 0 Comments |
| .fuck.tastic. |
| 01.29.04 (6:32 pm) [edit] |
|
Check these sites out.... Jh [johnny.hollow] http://johnnyhollow.com conclave.obscurum http://cmart.design.ru gorillaz http://gorillaz.com they leave me envious and I would sell my soul for the genius and money their abilties would bring me... |
| 0 Comments |
| .urban.magic. |
| 01.28.04 (11:56 pm) [edit] |
|
[ music | one ] [i]"is it getting better, or do you feel the same?? will it make it easier on you now, if you've got someone to blame"[/i] [LINE] sorry.. as I've been reminded I failed to actually post something to this 'magick' thing... lets see, I was going to make a point the fact that I'm never sure what to write about, and then it hit me... why don't you write about yourself, your background and where you come from.. so I figured that I should sort of write a back pit memoir of where I've been and who I've done... but to target the subject line just for this evening... [LINE] I am, of spiritual recourse and by nature, a shaman... It is not my 'practice', mainly because I do not need to practice living. It is not my religion, because I have a thing about oblique dogma, gospels, and believing the written words of man... [but that is altogether a different rant] a shaman's place is slightly outside the tribe; he is the healer, or medicine man; he knows a great many things about the worlds of spirit, dream, and man. it is his place to walk between worlds and help man understand them... he is a warrior in the otherealms, to fight and protect his tribe against things they cannot see... he is the sage, to heal and help those that are somewhat damaged in this world.. So you see, I have magic to me... I was a crow... and as I wish, I shapeshift when needs be, to find answers and keep my perspectives fresh... I am not perfect... but thats what the journey is all about... I have one foot in this world... I have one foot in the others... I am the in between... but still have much to learn... So this is a part of what I am... I'll get to more interesting tales as we go... +laine+ |
| 2 Comments |
| .magic spelt with a 'K', isn't.... |
| 01.26.04 (7:04 pm) [edit] |
| ... [i]see comments for my rant[/i] ... |
| 2 Comments |
| .here. |
| 01.25.04 (12:48 am) [edit] |
|
[ music | touched by vast ] tired and wondering what I've done with my soul or spirit this week... going to bed now... =| |
| 0 Comments |
| .lustful. | ||||||||||||||||||||||
| 01.24.04 (7:23 pm) [edit] | ||||||||||||||||||||||
|
The Dante's Inferno Test has banished you to the Second Level of Hell! Here is how you matched up against all the levels:
Take the Dante's Inferno Test |
||||||||||||||||||||||
| 3 Comments | ||||||||||||||||||||||
| now |
| 01.23.04 (11:14 pm) [edit] |
|
[ music | Tool ~ Bottom ] \"My compassion is broken now. My will is eroded, and my desire stolen and it makes me feel ugly. I\'m on my knees and burning.\" [LINE] Bugger, havent had time to post something serious today... fuck. I need more time. I never seem to have time to do anything I want lately... need that high paying job that gives me a five day weekend, so I can sit around and paint all day.. _________________________ ________ |aaaaahhhh kittens attacking my ceiling! ] | okay, all good, just wresting with their tennis ball...] Damn.. I had something ingenius to write earlier, but I forgot it.. ______ adding: oh well... need to add my comic list to the side pallet still... too many, too .. many.. ___________ Been Reading: E=MC2: a biography of the world\'s most famous equation by david bodanis.. it is very well written, and mostly revolves the lives that built, constructed, destroyed, and created with the used of the Equation that Einstein discovered. __________ Been Writing: eeeee lots.. working on plots for a convention in march... working on \"Willshaper: Gilliam\'s Theif\" and \"Polorize: Saint of Never\" gonna run.. time for bed.. +laine+ |
| 4 Comments |
| commercialwhores... [04 Dec 2003|01:10am] |
| 01.21.04 (8:48 pm) [edit] |
|
[ mood | cynical ] [ music | blue . a perfect circle ] {old post} Well, if it knocks it down to something.. all the worlds end can be pointed at those selfcentred, souless, diseased children of the tube... those that must look and be everyfuckin thing they seen.. soccercougarmilfs that scavage the plains of retail industria with or without their nonfatcarmelfuccacino... this one goes out to you... that are the servants... those that understand that the universe does not rotate upon perfectly manicured noses... I should be a radio dj at this point.. cuz I obviously have nothing better to fuckin do at a 1 in the a.m. cheers for fears +laine+ |
| 6 Comments |
| .burning.effigies. |
| 01.21.04 (10:57 am) [edit] |
|
ef·fi·gy n. pl. ef·fi·gies [1] A crude figure or dummy representing a hated person or group. [2] A likeness or image, especially of a person. Idiom: in effigy Symbolically, especially in the form of an effigy: The deposed dictator was burned in effigy by the crowd. [LINE] war with every breath with every time you breathe war with every conflict with every single fight life is breath life is struggle we are not free we must fight with every breath just to live so why would you just lay down to die? war war to cut you war to cleanse you there is no peace there is always a choice to do nothing is oppression to not speak up is failure to humanity to not free others is to be the enemy to be subjective only screams that you are nothing but a tool to be passive is to deficate on passion to violate anothers right to live and believe this is the cost of your humanity no one is right no one is innocent every loss deminishes us we are one we are breath we do not lie down to die every child is our future every fire is our loss every act of ignorance is willed every oppressive belief is a blind lie every hand that strikes the weaker is a clockwork every might that makes right is an act of fear every hurt is rape of land I will have your heads I will have your hate I will have your fear take this all take this inside my spirit to be a luck against you to know your enemy and I will make your suffer and I will make you free and I will cut your lies from your ignorant face and I will take your war to every last one, every last body for I am love and not the lies you believe not the hands or words or deeds of harm you will quiver in my bidden wake you will know fear but you will no longer cause hurt to the little ones at my feet ~bmc |
| 3 Comments |
| .placebo. |
| 01.20.04 (10:43 pm) [edit] |
|
As much as I'd like to claim Placebo are the reason I named my blog, thats actually not the case.. named it as a comment on mass media from a previous writing venture, noting how we are now force fed our culture through gap commercials ["mind the gap"], our disillusioned ease with spirituality and being given a false fix for our futures as the television and media hype spin and contort what we believe will make us happy... hence | placebo for my dis-ease | Regardless, the point was that my continued obsession with androgeny the sleek female in male and not the ten yr old boy super model look [gag]... its one thing to be thin because, like me, your dna and metabolism says 10:1 intake is turned into energy instead of fatty tissue storage... and a totally different thing when you look in the mirror and at Ninety Pounds on a 5'5" frame believe that you could stand to loose another 5 or so pounds and then you will have attained your 'ideal image'... anorexia and bulemia are mental diseases that are not easily recognized nor controlled... wait, where was I going with this??? Right, the sex or asexual being... Neil Gaiman's personafication of Desire. the lustful sexless or all-sex being... that is where human hearts can be controlled... and placebo has androgeny to spare... [LINE] [ placebo | Every me every you] Sucker love is heaven sent You pucker up, our passion's spent My hearts a tart, your body's rent My body's broken, yours is spent Carve your name into my arm Instead of stressed, I lie here charmed 'Cause there's nothing else to do Every me and every you Sucker love, a box I choose No other box I choose to use Another love I would abuse No circumstances could excuse In the shape of things to come. Too much poison come undone 'Cause there's nothing else to do Every me and every you Every me, me Sucker love is known to swing Prone to cling and waste these things Pucker up for heavens sake There's never been so much at stake I serve my head up on a plate It's only comfort, calling late 'Cause there's nothing else to do Every me and every you Every me, me Like the naked leads the blind I know I'm selfish, I'm unkind Sucker love I always find Someone to bruise and leave behind All alone in space and time There's nothing here but what here's mine Something borrowed, something blue Every me and every you Every me, me |
| 5 Comments |
| .you're a peice of glass left there on the beach. |
| 01.20.04 (8:07 pm) [edit] |
|
[ music | U2 achtung.baby ] Too much stuff to report on.. however I've managed to update some items. check out the Left Bar for REQUIREDENTERTAINMENT Toughts are weclome on some of the view things and drives that I keep close to heart... ALSO, I've noticed that a few people need headers... if you have something in mind, let me know.. I've made a few and have the wonders of Photoshop7 at my finger tips.. just ask! check out minou's header http://minou.tblog.com geocities.com/lyinghere/lipsheader.jpg .and. nightqueen http://NightQueen.tblog.com geocities.com/lyinghere/light.jpg +laine+ |
| 2 Comments |
| |do not go gentle into that good night : dylan thomas| |
| 01.20.04 (8:04 pm) [edit] |
|
One of my favorite poets... after a few years of doing my own work I discovered Thomas, and noticed that although I lack the rhyme and meter that he keeps in such a rigorous structure after decades of perfection, we have clean crop little analogies that we like to use, that forces the reader to investigate the meanings further.... underlying subtext is what a good prose is about. [LINE] Do not go gentle into that good night, Old age should burn and rave at close of day; Rage, rage against the dying of the light. Though wise men at their end know dark is right, Because their words had forked no lightning they Do not go gentle into that good night. Good men, the last wave by, crying how bright Their frail deeds might have danced in a green bay, Rage, rage against the dying of the light. Wild men who caught and sang the sun in flight, And learn, too late, they grieved it on its way, Do not go gentle into that good night. Grave men, near death, who see with blinding sight Blind eyes could blaze like meteors and be gay, Rage, rage against the dying of the light. And you, my father, there on the sad height, Curse, bless, me now with your fierce tears, I pray. Do not go gentle into that good night. Rage, rage against the dying of the light. ~dylan thomas 1914-1953 © 1952 |
| 3 Comments |
| .why don't you go outside and play "Hide and go fuck yourself". |
| 01.20.04 (4:18 am) [edit] |
|
Xrist... too many things to rant about at once... hmmm I'll just layer it all on... you want details ask... time... it exists solely to prevent my rest and health... I'm on a kewl new permanent schedule at Chapters [its the corporate bk store I work for] 8-4 tues-sat... its awesome.. too bad I'm nocturnal... I can't seem to go to bed before 2am and have a bitch of a time getting up at 6ish... [gee four hours of sleep, well no wonder] just a matter of time before I adjust [fingers crossed] ... regardless, I'm fatigued at this point... so its sunday, my day off, got some plans.. meet the wife downtown and hang out with her and her subbie while their in session... followed by a trip to a martini bar call Vicious Circle, to meet freinds and check out a gallery showing of another person we know... had some drinks over the hours, smirnoff ice for me... hung out with some close friends and minou... made a foursome of it.. was awake till after four a.m. [a.m. being ante meridiem = before noon; and also p.m. being post meridiem = after noon ] I woke at 6ish [yes two hours later] to head out for my interview for a management position; which went very well... went home, napped for an hour, then got up and went to the bank and did goceries... minou's leg has been numb and painfull for nearly two week, so we got a ride around seven thirty to the hosipital as it was getting worse... spent six or so hours there and we're home now.. I am dead... cannot go to work as we are going to the doctors when they open, if they will let us in... blah, sleep... getting some now! nite/morning Job interviews... I've done too many and think I talk to much during them now.. just had one today |
| 4 Comments |
| we come into this world screaming and covered in blood... why shouldn't every day be just as great? |
| 01.18.04 (12:48 am) [edit] |
|
[ music | faraway so close ] fucking wonderful... well I've managed to update a few things.. some pictures on my site : http://geocities.com/lyingher... also added some pohems http://www.geocities.com/lyinghere/pohem_five.html" title="http://www.geocities.com/lyinghere/pohem_five.html" target="_blank"http://www.geocities.com/lyin... convinced my wife to post some of our party life on her blog.. oh, okay, she would have done it all on her own, but hey, who am I to prevent the masses from a good jerk or fingering?? minou http://minou.tblog.com/ gave her a new header as well... managed to con a friend from another blog site to move here and gave her a header cuz she's thousands of miles from her photoshop tools =p sss http://mistressserpent.tblog.... things good... off tomorrow... have an art show to go to =] watched lxg going to watch dazed and confused... +laine+ ["if you don't know me by now, suck harder"] |
| 5 Comments |
| .aloud. |
| 01.17.04 (10:08 pm) [edit] |
|
[ music | afi~silver+cold ] [ mood | repressed ] I recall a time when I would sing.... rather loudly... I still have a penchant for lying on the floor listening to music... or lying around... drinking wine and just listening to music based off of my mood... but lately that hasn't been an option... you see I live in a museum with white-picket neighbors that cannot tolerate high decible levels or medium ones for that fact.. they aren't rude, just again not my house, ergo, cannot rock the canoe... loud angry music makes our current spiritual oppression tolerable... its a part of the passion I still have some where... I feel lately like I'm living like the watered-down version of myself... I'm not the same, but is that because I don't want to be, or that I've changed... something about quarterlife crisis comes to mind... too much anger in me.. can't get it out... can't let my feelings out... lost a lot of what I used to feel and I am uncertain as to why... Music is how I deal with stress and the world... oh wait.. okay, sex is how I deal with stress and music is how I deal with the world... but I sense the point to all of this is better explained with a touch of my background... skip this is you've managed to get bored by this point, I tend to get long winded as I like to explain concepts... concepts are kind of a fetish of mine... anyways, I, as a personal spirit, practice shamanism by taking journeys... a journey is like a daydream during meditation, only you control the overall aspect of the dream and attempt to either find an answer to a question by asking spirits for guidance or gain luck by moving things into place or a proper order [umm I'll avoid the metaphysics of it all here] Anyways, this is way to find peace and relax when things are pressing rather heavy on you or when you need help from beyond... my point to the shamanism is that we all function to a certain degree within, what some native cultures refer to as the medicine wheel... all things work in aspects of wheels or circles that affect all life... I prefer to translate a bit more for modern concepts.. so view these as computer circuits or as gears.. each cog or line forms a connection, and each connection ties us to each other and all other powers of the universe... the elements and spirit... so these gears on a social level create the dynamic of tribes... but these personal contact tribes are more based upon those we work with... think about where you work, you can consider that company a tribe, but within it are cliques [or cliks, as we have re-dubbed them], so yet another tribe... your home life, those you live with or vist outside of work.. yet another kind of tribe... they feed us in different ways, emotions, learning, etc... so we lack certain necessities living in these modern tribes... angry music is a reflection of this need.. it touches us back to the primal instincts we still have, those we cannot avoid... so without the hunter/protector aspect of our lives, we suffer different types of soma-damage... our bodys build up different levels of damage from not being fed properly in spirit mind as well as the physical. there is a passion and hunger for the rage that a lot of music can create... it can allow us to feel lust or violence, without being inguaged in those activities... which is another dissasociative problem in itself, but over all it allows us to release the violent primal and instinctive beings were are supposed to be... +laine+ |
| 4 Comments |
| .:really.hot.idea:. |
| 01.17.04 (4:53 pm) [edit] |
|
as my wife posted her bondage orgy, I thought the ideas I added were too good 'not' to share.... [LINE] minou http://minou.tblog.com my fucking thoughts Friday 01.16.04 [10:41 pm] most of my thought process is taken up by fucking, orgies, SM and slaves. I want a stable with pony bois and girls. I have this orgy going on in the back of my head at all time. I see this hot chick walk by and its like hmmm she would look good tied on a horse or tied to a wall. mmmm fucking all the time. If I could I would have this room where people would be fucking all the time. But I would have people in corners watching, some mastubating, some getting head or face, others just watching. And giant windows, for the voyers... [LINE] » lyinghere 01.17.04 [3:50 pm] (PST) you forgot the giant mirrored one-way viewing wall to the west.. and then the lowered basin room on the east, where its an orgy lounge beside the dungeon, so the dungeon looks like an aquarium of bondage orgies with the mirrored wall is reflecting the action... guess this is why you married me after all... too much about dream space is at my command... |
| 0 Comments |
| .intolerance. |
| 01.16.04 (10:22 pm) [edit] |
|
[ music | tool ] been listening madly to undertow lately... although I claim 'sober' is my song.... I've been leaning to some of the more enlightened songs this week... [LINE] I don't want to be hostile. I don't want to be dismal. But I don't want to rot in an apathetic existance either. See I want to believe you, and I want to trust and I want to have faith to put away the dagger. But you lie, cheat, and steal. And yet I tolerate you. Veil of virtue hung to hide your method while I smile and laugh and dance and sing your praise and glory. Shroud of virtue hung to mask your stigma as I smile and laugh and dance and sing your glory while you lie, cheat, and steal. How can I tolerate you. Our guilt, our blame, I've been far too sympathetic. Our blood, our fault. I've been far too sympathetic. I am not innocent. You are not innocent. No one is innocent. I will no longer tolerate you. Even if I must go down beside you. Because, No one is innocent. |
| 1 Comments |
| stratosphere |
| 01.13.04 (9:35 pm) [edit] |
|
[ mood | fuck me :shock: ] [ music | U2 - so cruel.until the end of the world] "in my dream, I was drowning my sorrows, but my sorrows, they'd learned to swim, surrounding me, going down on me" Well their isn't much to waste time on any longer.. I'm a tad disillusioned at the moment.. big shock, huh... sort of exhausted, which is sucky, cuz I was doing pretty good earlier in the day... new permanent schedule new duties at work.. doing different things all day long now, so its taken out some of the mo-naughty-nany of it all... rather have fun playing with or torturing people... added some new links to friends and such.. still need to dump a mass of music lists onto that sidebar.. guess I should do that now.... |
| 2 Comments |
| no.rants |
| 01.12.04 (3:04 pm) [edit] |
|
meh, nothing to complain about this second... but I updated my pics, hope they're looking alright [maybe I should do gay porn or bondage porn, I at least have the stomach for it=] and will eventually add of the book and music info I want to... |
| 2 Comments |
| simplistic |
| 01.11.04 (11:02 pm) [edit] |
|
look kidz... here's that rant I promised... I don't have a big audience here, so what I say earns its own indifference.. regardless.. I'm tired of bitchy whiny people.. I tend to enjoy my craptastic attitude, keeping it all to myself, but lately the tolerance has wavered.. first I'm offended should someone think this is specificially about them.. there is actually several people I've deem worthy of this rant... if you want to know if its you, just ask... otherwise grow some balls and ask... all in total I can blame at least six people from everywhere that have caused this festered disposition. okay, so here we go... look, wtf is wrong with people??? I've obviously lost my ability to commune with them.. Being in the presence of several people turns on some kind of claustrophobia in me... I don't care what they think about me, but if I have to listen to one more assinine "me me me blah blah me blah" speech, I'm bound to strangle someone... interesting conundrum... I don't want to be around people anymore.. but I don't want to be alone either. How do you fix that? I want companionship obviously without working on it.. because I can't bring for the energy to find people of kine intent. Regardless, I'm tired of getting someone's opinion when its not asked for, or some idiotic comment about so and so band sucks, or this is how you shoud do something cause I say so.. well maybe its your band, and you like the music they play, or maybe you hate their style but a fact remains THEY HAVE A MUSIC CAREER AND YOU DON'T... so saying so&so sucks fails to explain why they suck, cuz they did something to get on television and get that two hundred thousand dollar record deal to start out with.. where are you??? exactly where I am. working in a coffee/book store or a restaurant or call centre, while that sucky band is on stage, thats where. we are nowhere... generation nowhere. [my book in progress] as the mind behind fightclub said: "an entire gereration pumping gas, waiting tables, slaves in white collars. Advertising has us chasing cars and clothes, working jobs we hate so we can buy shit we don't need. We are the middle children of history. No purpose, no place. We have no great war; no great depression. Our great war is a spiritual war; our great depression is our lives. We've all been raised on televison to believe that one day we'll all be millionaires and movie gods and rock stars. Be we won't. We're slowly learning that fact. And we're very, very pissed off." ~ Chuck Palahniuk So where do we belong, where do go from here? I don't believe in the god of the bible.. there are double standards and controls set in place that lock the human spirit... if you worship god, do so in your own way. my god is the source, energy that binds us.. it has no name no need for worship. this universe is made from one thing. energy. it binds us and makes us one. bearing this in mind and this slightly skewed tangent.... if we are bound and connected together, why are we alone? |
| 4 Comments |
| set |
| 01.10.04 (9:35 pm) [edit] |
|
spent too many hours adjusting my header today... not satisfied until now.. think this should work... have to rant more later... mostly about fucking idiots that think they know it all... and couldn't get a joke if it fucked them up the ass.. |
| 4 Comments |
| .mobius.addiction. |
| 01.10.04 (5:27 pm) [edit] |
|
fuck... so I've been kicking around deviant art, http://deviantart.com , and there are over four million images on there... a minor obsession to say the least... regardless, I've been picking through the fetish and erotic imagery today.. only just begun on subject to paruse... if ya get bored, check it out... some very impressive work on there and our friend Lennon's work is on there too... http://darktrash.deviantart.com" title="http://darktrash.deviantart.com" target="_blank"http://darktrash.deviantart.c... cheers +laine+ btw what do you think of mobius.addiction as a band name?? |
| 2 Comments |
| fucking |
| 01.09.04 (12:24 pm) [edit] |
|
[music | orestes - a perfect circle] anyways, thought I should add a poll or something... hmmm what will render the best results... sex and violence... that'll do it... [that should increase my ratings] ------------------------- -------------------- HOW ROUGH DO YOU LIKE YOUR SEX? ------------------------- -------------------- |
| 6 Comments |
| fucky |
| 01.09.04 (10:30 am) [edit] |
|
Oh, guess I should explain that 'mood' I posted.. the story goes... my mother is very funny.. she is a little-old-english lady that never swears [around her children anyways, even though we are 26, 35, 39] anyways, sadly one day she had slipped down the stairs and broke her leg... my sisters are trying to help her out cuz they hear the commotion, they ask her what is wrong, but all she can say is "fucky, oh fucky" *laughs* you may have to have been there [I wasn't] but my family has this weird way of being fairly normal [in the good way] so sometimes its hard to miss out on all the fun or incidents... so thats the story.. "fucky" being the "I've broken my leg, kinda day" cheers +Llaine+ ps I should also point out that my grandmother [on my mothers side] use to watch Boxing and Drink OV50 religiously, she also would swear like a sailor should the occasion rise... I'm quite proud of my family.. they kept me in line with out forcing me. |
| 5 Comments |
| .db. androgny |
| 01.07.04 (8:05 pm) [edit] |
|
[music: .db. | "bring me the head of the 'disco king' "] [mood: fucky, yes I said fucky] looking more like home.. slowly figuring out how to play with this blog.. hmmm what to rant about now?? why can't I be "Davi.db.owiE" Androgynous?? I mean really.. what kind of surgery would it take to have the admiration of billions of lust raving fans? I'm close... but to maintain this rugged beauty, boyish youthy somethingness for like fourty years without giving up yourself to some evil incarnate deity... now thats just unlikely without supernatural help... [or far too costly, I mean what does a soul go for on the underworld market these days??] meh, you'd figure you star in couple of porn vidz and you'd at least have the money to buy yourself some permanent youth, wouldnt ya? oh well .. on with today... going to |machine| I think.. loud angry music to cure the aching spirit... later +laine+ |
| 7 Comments |
| pushes [edit] |
| 01.06.04 (3:50 am) [edit] |
|
there are ghosts in that room sitting & smoking waiting for the years to come in the dark reading or shifting or piling things into themselves ghosts shape the rooms that we live in so they can swallow us whole when she walks in the room through the threshold and finds new beginnings seeping out of every pore and pander her silver cross around her neck my bidden palms around her neck as the sound breaks and pushes us from the scene we make to the scene that ordanely or divinely follows lost my marker once again in the bustle and bow of the shipwrecked crowd as she leaves through the silence of the wind rushed masthead we are talking over rushes of rust bitter coffee and she talks so calmly about the disasterous effect of life on water [pushing us on] I missed the pang of my bitten heart and stomach crying out like a lost sea [red dot to signal Turner home] looking intimately for the only thing that purifies the fallen brow so the bidden lay the weary at my cross & stone and I build makeshift images with paint and broken fingers streaking red blue green gold on a covering of my own demise a paint riddled surface of an ancient oak door gone soft but heavy with the edge & weathering of time so I push again at the frayed edges of your hair & mask upon you head and face and somewhere on the far sealed edge we find the children playing and pushing dusty checkers on an untouched board |
| 5 Comments |
| again... |
| 01.06.04 (3:26 am) [edit] |
|
I'm restless again... swathed in anger and frustration... I need some kind of outlet... I'm going mad doing things like this, its like going in circles.. full moon, must be doing it too me again... two months in a row that its decided to affect me more so than not... hmmm what to rant about? got mail asking if I would be someone full time Dominant. They called me Master... kinda makes me sad, I haven't earned the right to be called Master, but they never asked permission either... I wonder where this leaves me.. taking a stance on the world seems to be a vastly more complex thing than you'd expect... to do, to be, not to just stand around like everyone else.... harder to do when motivating people is like pulling teeth.. making them see a world underneath their noses... when you, yourself, happens to still be sleeping... back to the not sleeping.. its three-thrity am... wtf am I doing?? oh well, maybe the sorrow will drain from me, or at least this anger... where have all the people that like to talk gone?? just me here.. no one here... |
| 2 Comments |
| life |
| 01.06.04 (3:19 am) [edit] |
|
we are beings... not doings... don't do it. be it. |
| 0 Comments |
| enlargen your world |
| 01.06.04 (3:18 am) [edit] |
|
[ music | Gary Jules : Mad World ] I woke up this morning and had this running through my head all day... for those that have seen donnie darko, you can imagine how fucked up my day has felt... for those that have yet to see it, do so... [LINE] All around me are familiar faces Worn out places, Worn out faces Bright and early for the daily races Going nowhere, Going nowhere Their tears are filling up their glasses No expression, No expression Hide my head I want to drown my sorrow No tomorrow, No tomorrow And I find it kind of funny, I find it kind of sad These dreams in which i'm dying, Are the best I've ever had I find it hard to tell you, I find it hard to take When people run in circles it's a very very Mad World, Mad World Children waiting for the day they feel good Happy Birthday, Happy Birthday And they feel the way that every child should Sit and listen, Sit and listen Went to school and I was very nervous No one knew me, No one knew me Hello teacher tell me whats my lesson Look right through me, Look right through me And I find it kind of funny, I find it kind of sad These dreams in which i'm dying, Are the best I've ever had I find it hard to tell you, I find it hard to take When people run in circles it's a very very Mad World, Mad World Enlargen your world Mad World _________________________ _ |
| 1 Comments |
| fuck'em if ya got'em |
| 01.02.04 (11:18 pm) [edit] |
|
christ.. I know I know.. I haven't been on here ranting in a while.. been dying from some common flu ass kicking cold thing... regardless... I'll come up with something more interesting to bitch about soon... had a list somewhere... cheers +laine+ |
| 2 Comments |
_________________________
_________________________
_________________________
|
-silence- .speak without fear. .know that beauty is balance/beauty is flesh. .know that life is a road we fall blindly downward. .know that when we touch, we affect things. .know this all means something. .love is only here to devour & fondle us. |